“The Fall...in brief"
The bus is careering down the expressway. After some sharp braking activity earlier I now have a safety belt on — because I also hit my head twice on the window — dozing off to sleep. I need to feel safe — in place — in control.
I know its been months but I’m back. Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius… time marches on… Good things have happened and not so good things have happened… and its all happened very quickly.
Which is often the case for a Sagittarian… the astrological speed demon. No sooner said than done… though often said too quickly… oops… did I hurt your feelings?
The safety belt makes me feel, well, basically, taken care of. It’s how I wish I felt all the time — or I think I want to feel like this — rather than on some random frolicking big dipper merry-go-round type life experience — clinging to my seat in fear of danger — imminent.
That’s how its felt of late… like I just cant figure out whats going on in this world that seeminglymoves backwards and forwards at the same time. So I haven't been writing these newsletters— i haven't really known what to say… cause I like to be positive… and really Ive been a little freaked out.
When i was young I imagined aging was soft and gentle… like my grandmother — simple and kind of charming really. I didn't know I’d be updating apps on a daily basis and trying to negotiate survival.
For nearly 3 years I’ve been building a new business — this is a challenge — because it’s new — you just don't know whats going on… or whats next — you’ve no experience to fall back on. So I ask a lot of questions — but sometimes I feel like I'm bugging people… it’s hard to ask for help —
especially when you need it.
And then there’s being single… this is only great cause I can decorate the house just as I like it… otherwise I prefer company. But really… I can’t whinge — my life is blessed.
I’m looking forward to xmas.